I stumbled across an old blog post today, one I wrote over four years ago, when I was coming back to running after almost eight years off. It was funny and very meaningful to see how far I’d come, and I thought I’d share it with you again here:
Ha! So, it turns out hubby is not *quite* on board with the whole “I want to do a marathon again” plan. I decided to e-mail him my idea yesterday when he was at work (is someone avoiding confrontation, Hmmmm?) In any case, it went a little something like this:
Me: So, babe…I really, really, really want to do a marathon again. I am thinking maybe Indiana in late April, or (and this is me really pulling out all the stops) Buffalo in late May? (He’s from just outside Buffalo, so yes, I was playing the visit the hometown/family card. Who says I can’t play dirty?)
Hubby: We’ll talk about it tonight. (Loosely translated: Have you lost your F&**$&^G mind, woman?!?)
Hmmmmm…can’t say I am surprised. It’s not that he doesn’t want to get sucked into the dark void of marathon training that can pretty much take over your life. I know it’s just because he is worried about me getting hurt again or not listening to my body and pushing past what it (read: my knee) can handle. Funny thing is, I am less worried about myself physically, and more concerned about where I will be mentally if I set this goal and am unable to follow through with it. I am like that; once I set a goal I am like a heat seeking missile and it pretty much takes an act of God (or crushing 1/2 of my knee joint) to get me to stop.
In the end, though, I am a goal setter. I run because I love it and it is as natural to breathing to me, and setting a goal at doing a marathon again just gives me butterflies every time I think about it; I am so excited about seeing if I can do what I was told I could never do again. If I approach this with the attitude that I am accomplishing so much more running wise than I ever thought I would be able to post surgery, the actual completing of the marathon is just icing on the cake, as it were.
So, I am going to see what I can do. I am going to take every run as a gift and get those miles in. I am going to listen to my body. I will rest. I will fuel properly. And above all, I will continue to believe that my best running – and my best self – are yet to be, whether or not the marathon is something I can do again.
Four years later, I have run over six more marathons, six 50 mile races, and two 100’s. I say this not to brag, but to tell you that to never give up on a dream or a goal that wakes you up in the middle of the night, you’re so excited about it. That makes you hum with possibility and hope. Never. Give. Up.
On the note of never giving up, check out this clip. Tell me this doesn’t give you goosebumps or brings tears to your eyes (it does every time I watch it)
